Dessein Parke
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Dessein Parke Blog

Musings and opinions with a theoretically Interiors related bias

Grinchy Mc Grouch

Admittedly the link between design and the content of this post is as tenuous as the very last silk thread ever spun under the super moon, or the mega moon, or whatever there recent earthquake causing moon was called by the oldest silkworm of all time at the strike of midnight BUT it is distracting me from the mountain of bills I should be paying and the 2 year old in the background screaming his head off who refuses to go to sleep. So don’t get your hopes up.

I am somewhat of a grinch when it comes to christmas. And even worse I am an apathetic grinch; apathy being the great epidemic of the world these days.

People getting excited about christmas makes me grouchy as does the crap load of dinero we all fork out for this one day of the year which I SWEAR can only have been conceived by Hallmark, or Nestle such is its evil geniusness. However my chronic apathy means I also spend too much which I dislike but do anyway.

I really really strongly dislike the sense of panic and whirling crazy that gets whipped up around this time of the year, almost as much as I dislike the apocolyptic  sense of doom that you almost feel obliged to feel.. like you will never get everything done by xmas, and the world is going to end…..until next year. Whatever this soul crushingly pertinent ‘things that need to get done’ is I couldn’t put into words, but it is there, lurking in the background of my mind, even thought I know perfectly well its just some weird social construct.

Other things that make me grouchy, just off the top of my head..

You know that old adage measure twice cut once? What if you are like me and really crap at measuring things and thus get a different number every measurement? Or like me and really crap at cutting and thus end up sawing or cutting on an angle, or the piss (he he)  or something so it is still inaccurate? Not so clever now are you, adage?

The other one I love to hate is the trueism about building….take your budget and your timeframe and double it and then it will be accurate. This one is hard to stuff up whoever you are, unless by some holy shining light miracle you get a quote that is actually accurate, done by someone who doesn’t do things on the fly or think in rainbows and measure in pussy cats.

A major bug bear right now is the ridonkulous amount of boxes we have loitering around our house. I buy quite a lot of my lighting, fixtures and fittings and other random things, including pretty much all of my xmas presents online, which means I get a LOT of parcels. Parcels the size of my Children sometimes

I know what you are thinking….jea-zus get that woman to shopping rehab this instant, and I am sure you are not incorrect BUT see that big box on the bottom? It had one storage box in it and thats it. I got something from another online retailer the other day, and it had a chopping board in it. And it was a medium sized box. Don’t get me wrong people, its like cat heaven right now with all the boxes, and the kids love popping all the bubble wrap stuff but what a freaking waste.

The schmuck who stole my car park the other day while I was doing a 3 million point turn (complete with back seat running commentary and full Q and A) obviously so I could get the carpark, which I was partially blocking anyway. I know where you live* and I am going to come over to your house and force you to listen to every single wiggles album ever made in one sitting. While you feed my kids dinner.

The word busy. I don’t know what I dislike more about it; the word itself or the super conscientious effort I constantly make to avoid using it because I think it is the laziest most overused cop out of a word ever. Everyone is busy these days but as I read on a mug or something the other day ‘I am really busy. Actually i’m lying, I just don’t want to do that.’

*yeah not really

Natalie Parke